This stuff better friggin' work!

Ants are taking over the world. And by the world, I mean my house.

When we returned from our honeymoon, I found an army of ants coming from a hole in a baseboard in our bathroom. I patched the hole up, killed the ants (which had made a cozy home out of the laundry I had done) and thought that was done with. The next day, they were coming out of a hole in the baseboard on the opposite side of the bathroom! Now our house was built within the last 10 years so I don't know why there are holes all over the baseboards, but whatever. So I did the same thing I did the day before. And this is where I think the ants are playing a cruel trick on me. Of course I have never liked ants, but I never had a strong hatred for them. Now, they are public enemy no. 1. I have seriously had nightmares about them-- crawling on me, my dog, my bed, my food. Sometimes now even just at the sight of one, it's like I feel them crawling on me. They are getting in my head! I'm fantasizing cruel and unusual ways to kill them. Luring them with sugar, spraying hairspray and lighting them on fire. Or luring them to the microwave and letting radiation do it's job. No, I'm not crazy...

But today, TODAY, I nearly lost it. I woke up and Millie was laying next to me all curled up on the pillow and I thought, how cute! I need to get a picture of this. So I go to the kitchen to start coffee and get my camera from my purse which is on my kitchen counter. And *insert screeching horror movie music here* there are ants POURING from the phone jack and plug outlet on the wall. So I am there for 40 minutes scooping them into the sink, shaking them off of our papers and dishes, smashing them, spraying them with kitchen cleaner (I don't have bug spray). By the time the situation was semi-under control, I had to leave for school. No shower, no makeup, no coffee, just utter defeat. So I sprinkled coffee grounds in front of the outlets and in front of the door to Millie's room so they won't carry her away while I'm gone (FYI: coffee grounds are an ant repellent). Josh sent me some online reviews of this product, Terro Liquid Ant Killer. It is said to be amazing. You put a few drops on some cardboard next to where the ants are entering and they take some as food back to their home. It eventually kills the ant and since they brought it to their home, it kills even the ones you can't see. I picked some at Ace Hardware on the way home for $5. This stuff better friggin' work. I'm pretty sure the builders of this home just plopped it right on top of a massive ant hill. Ah, the adventures of home ownership.

I was going to post something more pleasant, but alas, this has been my day.